jan 31, 2025
my first blog post! yahoo!
life is.. just okay right now. it WAS better before winter break, but idk what happened. school is draining me, my roommate (who is usually chill) is letting her alarms ring for like 30 minutes before she gets up, my driving lessons start tomorrow and i'm petrified, i'm unnecessarily worrying about the sats and my friends are getting hostile. it's probably january cabin fever, and once spring rolls around life could be good again?!?!? there was a lot of snow a couple days ago but it all got washed away by the rain. it's just sludge now. :(
as for my love life.. it's looking up. i'm going on a "date" this weekend with this guy who really liked me which is cute! i'm not a person who takes relationships super seriously.. i mean i'm 17 i'm not looking to get married LMAO and he's a senior, committed to a college, so if we ever date we'll probably break up in the summer. which is fine w me! i personally don't think hs relationships will neeever be serious. and i like that!
recently school has been kicking my ass. more specifically, TRIGONOMETRY. that's the devil's shit. i'm thoroughly convinced. it's hard but i'm inching along (a loooot slower than my classmates). my other classes are swell, i'm just tired ;; i can't WAIIIT for spring break. i've never been strong in math and everyone just assumes im stupid (and they're absolutely BRUTAL to me about it cuz im asian), which also doesn't help with my seemingly neverending sat prep. booooooooo. i wish that wasn't real.
here's a little secret for all of you! regarding college, i really really want to go to brown. and if not, vassar! i want to pursue english or theater. i love playwrighting and and just writing too. just a lil tidbit. and regarding theater rn, i'm stage managing my school's production of chicago. it's almost tech week and it looks HORRIBLEEE but all shows always do and do fine during opening. lol. the wonders of performing arts.
i'm just drowwwning in work and insecurity rn, but i'm sure february will be miles better. it's important to keep your head up like this!!! and i recently ordered some books to read. i haven't read in SO long and the last book (?) i read was romeo and juliet.
i'll write again soon!
feb 9, 2025
soooo tired right now... my period is right around the corner, trig is kicking my ass, i have so much work to do yet no work to do?, and i can't wait for spring break ;;;; it's tough out here! my tech week starts this next coming week, so there's that. i started my driving lessons and i've only been on the road twice but i'm not too bad (im petrified that i'm gonna forget everything during my road test tho). i played the drums for the first time in a while just to ground myself again so that was fun.. sooo not looking forward to life in general though. wish i could live in a little bubble and be a worm or some shit
im sooo pissed cuz i got a 72 on my trig test so i have to retake it AGGHHHHH so much work. and i have an essay to write about MYSELF due soon which is so weird but also fun? plus tech week just takes up a lot of time and there have been little fights within the cast lately (we're doing chicago!) my situationship is going swimmingly though so that's a yay! i also made a snowman today with my friend and that was fun but i so need winter to be over. the cold is NOT cute anymore and it's just annoying! though i do love my puffer hehh
i think i need to listen to some new music but idk where to start. i've been listening to a lot of musical theater and doechii and kpop but it's getting kinda repetitive. i gave beabadoobee a try cuz all my friends love her and i will say she has a cute voice but her songs are not my stye. maybe it's time i fall back to mcr? heheh..